Good ... Still Not Great.

 

 

The same people who overlooked the flaws of the first two Spider-Man films by Sam Raimi are some of the same ones currently bashing Spider-Man 3. They went in with huge expectations and came away hugely disappointed. Spider-Man 3, which faced the daunting task of trying to hit the heights of its critically acclaimed predecessor Spider-Man 2, is not as bad a movie as some are saying it is, but the curtain is fully open on Raimi's machine and the warts and quirks are revealed for all to see. I, however, actually enjoyed this film, helped by the fact, perhaps, that the first viewing was on an IMAX screen, an amazing experience. There is no lack of action here, which is usually a good thing, but ultimately and ironically it may turn out to be this one's shortcoming.

 

Spider-Man 3 picks up right where the last one left off. Peter and Mary Jane are continuing a new relationship (though it already feels old and tiresome), while Harry is ready to take his Daddy's goodies and exact revenge on Spider-Man for his death. We are introduced to two new antagonists, a powdery, shapeshifter called The Sandman (Thomas Haden Church) and Venom (Topher Grace), a rival photographer/alien monster.  Peter must juggle these three villainous threats, while at the same time proposing to MJ, and attempting to "put her first" per good ole Aunt May's advice, all without turning "teh evil".

 

There is just way too much going on in this movie. Several scenes and plot-lines feel forced, and there are too many coincidences.  It looks like two movies crammed into one, and in actuality, might have made two really good films. The same man who dumped mechanical webshooters for realism decides pretty much anything goes here, including creepy alien stalkers and men who can transform into sand. All that withstanding, the visuals are great, its a fun ride, and there are some decent nods to the comics.

 

The Good

 

The best thing about Spider-Man 3  is the continuation and resolution of The Green Goblin saga (yeah, I'm biased) presented in the very first film. We finally see why James Franco was cast in this role seven years prior, and despite the lack of a decent costume, (yet again) he delivers in big way as the schizophrenic amnesiac, evil/best friend Harry Osborn. There are two major battles between Harry and Peter, one a visual, aerial delight, the other, a brutal, emotional throw-down in the Goblin Lair. This produces one of the film's most memorable lines where dark Peter refers to his friend as "little Goblin Jr". Harry has some good lines of his own, one involving ass-kicking and another some pie. We get classic comic stuff; goblin tormenting/playing mind games with Peter, something severly lacking from the first. The pumpkin bombs and razor bats are all back, along with some interesting, new weapons, all accented by Danny Elfman's haunting goblin theme. (He is glaringly missed) And everything is wrapped up neatly and should please most hardcore comic fans, as well as audiences.

 

JK Simmons is back, once again, hilarious as J Jonah Jameson. The scene where he has to watch his blood pressure had me chuckling out loud. Speaking of that scene, the way under-used Betty Brant (Elizabeth Banks) demonstrates once again, in a minute or less of screen time, why she's the hottest female character in this franchise.  Bruce Campbell offers his best cameo yet, and though seemingly barely there, it was also nice to at last see the Stacys. Bryce Dallas Howard is lovely as Gwen and seems a much better romantic choice than the moody,depressing Mary Jane.

 

After two films, we finally  get to see a cocky, wisecracking Spider-Man, now that he's "popular" (a minor annoyance) and been given the key to the city. Tobey Maguire is allowed to do more than just that usual, goofy, vacant stare, as he gets to wax evil in his new alien Spider-Duds. There's a funny scene with Ursula, aka "chocolate cake girl" and some cookies. "Go make me some", he says.  And, he's convincingly scary when he proceeds to tear a nightclub (and almost MJ) apart. (More about that and the rest of the cookies scene later). Maguire does his best job of the trilogy here, capturing the heart of Spidey.

 

The Bad

 

Seriously, I love Aunt May, I really do, but those sappy, long-winded speeches are getting old, and to make it worse Raimi forces us to imagine her and Uncle Ben in bathing suits. (Insert one of those full-bodied shivers here).  The only scene I really liked her in was the one where Pete was surprised at her reaction to Sandman's apparent demise.

 

Mary Jane. Not only was Kirsten Dunst  (arguably) miscast  in this role from the start, but the character has never been written exactly right, and it just gets worse in this film, as she's exposed as a selfish, whiney, talentless ***** with daddy issues. While any other mortal man would go RUNNING to Gwen Stacy, (or even better, to Betty!), Peter lovingly stands unwithered in the storm, like a whipped little puppy.  You're a better man than me dude.

 

Sandman. I was never a fan of the comics version, but tried to have an open mind. They came up with a potentially great backstory, and the visuals were nice, but in the end it was water-downed to the point one began to wonder what he was even doing in the story. And in typical Avi Arad fashion he was made sympathetic and they attempted to tie him personally to Peter, with a lame and uneccessary plot device that altered the origin and came dangerously close to stepping on Spider-Man Mythos. There were some great visuals, notably the "birth" scene, just not enough space and time for full development, and much like Venom, each would have likely been better without the other. Church, though perhaps through no fault of his own, is unable to come anywhere close to the presence and villianous menace of his predecessors, Molina and Dafoe, as Doc Ock and Green Goblin respectively. Also, great liberties were taken with Sandman's powers.   I remember the muck-monster from the comics of the early '80s ... do not expect me to embrace an  80 foot tall  Sandman. PLEEZE! And, since when can Sandman fly? Weird. His lengthy, awkward exit really detracts from the emotional climax between the three main characters.

 

I'm not going to complain too much about the goblin costume, because the story was done so well, but what was the point of that stupid half-mask, that he always took off anyway, and left him vulnurable to amesia-inducing head injuries? I can let the butler thing slide, even though it was a pretty lame copout. Its just another on the list of dozens of contrived coincidences, and, well, he could have been hiding the info for same reasons as Peter. Yeah, whatever, it was bad.

 

And Now ... The Ugly

 

Holy friggin' team-ups Batman!  When Sandman and Venom join up, its easily the most nonsensical, illogical part of the film, apparently done for no other reason than to get everyone together for one huge bang of a finale. Even that came off anti-climatic. Which brings me to Robin Leach's illiginimate daughter and her "play-by-play" of the "battle royale". Thanks Raimi, I needed that.

 

And speaking of Venom, he looks and acts extremely cool, but the decision  to have Topher Grace's voice talk throught the symbiote was, well a bad one, Dr Doom bad. Fans of the character will no doubt be angered by the amount of screen-time and by his uh,"exit". Raimi clearly doesn't like the character and doesn't bother to hide it.  Never been a Venom fan myself, but he probably deserved more. The movie should have ended with the church scene which would have led to a guaranteed successful fourth movie.

 

Its crying time. I understand all of the emotional moments, but not only does Raimi's Spidey yank his mask off every chance he gets, turns out, he's a little cry-baby. This is not helped by the fact Maguire looks as of he is having a clinically-retarded spasm of some sort when he cries. Oh and there is also joint-group and recreational crying it seems. Everyone cries at least once (except the landlord and his daughter. They're just tough that way).  I guess I should not be surprised, since it was established that Peter "cried like a baby" at MJ's first grade rendition of Cinderella.

 

I was carefully and cautiously prepared for the infamous dance scene in the jazz club. Turns out, that did not bother me near as much as the AWFUL Saturday Night Fever parody, with Peter giving random girls in the street  "da gun-fingers". It was funny, but inappropriate and went on WAY to long. Hold the extra-cheese please.

 

Even with all my complaints, I really enjoyed Spider-Man 3, and was mostly satisfied with the conclusions, but its clearly time for a new cast and director, if not a LONG rest before a possible reboot.  I can't rate it as highly as Spider-Man 2, but I probably liked it more, due in part, to all the Harry stuff and no "Good Ock". (Still bitter). It would probably have been much better with Harry and just one other villain. (LIZARD DAMMIT!) Lower your expectations, sit back and just watch for a fun, mindless, visually impressive Spidey movie. Oh, and do it on IMAX.

 

7 out of 10 pumpkin bombs.

 

 

http://www.goblinjournals.com/

wareagle 05/07/07